I'm a little later publishing this month than planned. Some PC trouble that doesn't amount to a hill o' beans when matched against the world's ongoing march to Ragnarok, but which has proved a colossal pain in the arse nonetheless...
Once again I would like to direct your attention to the wonderful Juli Kearns work on ACO, for example her analysis of the upcoming marina scene can be found here. There's insight aplenty along with some interesting parallels to others work. Highly recommended.
April Summary
1st - 4th: April begins at the marina where Alex issues his response to Georgie and Dim's challenge.
After his rule has been re-established
5th - 8th: the Droogs proceed to the Duke of New York snug to nurse their wounds and plan their next adventure.
9th - 26th: Georgie knows of a health farm in the countryside which is occupied by a lone woman and her cats.
Alex once again attempts the injured motorist routine
but is forced to scale the wall instead before confonting Mrs Weathers in an encounter that soon turns from comic to ultra violent.
As April showers give way to May flowers, the seedy Mr Deltoid makes another appearance to kick off the month.
April day by day
Note: There are minor differences between the screenplay text and the movie version. I've tried to get the timings correct, but there may be some inaccuracies, particularly where a passage takes place without dialogue.
EXT. FLATBLOCK MARINE – DAY
The gang come out of the flatblock and walk along the marina.
ALEX (V.O.)
As we walked along the flatblock marina, I
was calm on the outside but thinking all
the time,
1st April so now it was to be Georgie the
General, saying what we should do and what
not to do, and Dim as his mindless,
grinning bulldog. But, suddenly, I viddied
that thinking was for the gloopy ones and
that the oomny ones use like inspiration
and what Bog sends, for now it was lovely
music that came to my aid and I viddied at
once what to do.
2nd There was a window open
with the stereo on.
IN SLOW MOTION
Alex clubs Georgie into water with his stick. Dim swings chain.
3rd Alex ducks. Dim goes into water.
Alex kneels, hands behind back, takes knife from sword stick,
offers hand to help Dim, 4th and slashes Dim when he gets it.
Dim falls back into the water.
Alex laughs.
5th INT. DUKE OF NEW YORK PUB
The four boys sit round table.
ALEX (V.O.)
I had not put into any of Dim's main
cables and so, with the help of a clean
tashtook, the red, red kroovy stopped, and
it did not take long to quieten the two
wounded soldiers, down in the snug in the
Duke of New York. Now they knew who was
Master and Leader. Sheep, thought I, 6th but a
real leader knows always when like to give
and show generous to his unders.
ALEX
Well, now we're back to where we were.
Yes? Just like before and all forgotten?
7th Right, right, right.
ALL BOYS
Right. Right. Right.
ALEX
Well, Georgie Boy. This idea you've got
for tonight. Well, tell us all about it
then.
GEORGIE
8th Not tonight – not this nochy.
ALEX
Come, come, come, Georgie Boy. You're a
big strong chelloveck like us all. We're
not little children, are we, Georgie Boy?
What, then, didst thou in thy mind have?
Confrontation. Georgie backs down.
GEORGIE
9th It's this Health Farm. A bit out of the
town. Isolated. It's owned by this like
very rich ptitsa who lives there with her
cats. The place is shut down for a week
and she's completely on her own, and it's
10th full up with like gold and silver and like
jewels.
ALEX
Tell me more, Georgie Boy.
INT. CATLADY'S HOUSE
Catlady doing yoga exercises.
Room is full of cats. 11th Doorbell rings.
CATLADY
(softly to herself)
Oh shit.
She goes to the door.
EXT. CATLADY'S HOUSE
CATLADY
Who's there?
ALEX
Excuse me, missus, can you please help?
There's been a terrible accident. Can I
please use your telephone for an
ambulance?
CATLADY
12th I'm frightfully sorry. There is a
telephone in the Public House about a mile
down the road. I suggest you use that.
ALEX
But, missus, this is an emergency. It's a
matter of life and death. Me friend's
lying in the middle of the road bleeding
to death.
CATLADY
13th I... I'm very sorry, but I never open. I'm
very sorry but I never open the door to
strangers after dark.
ALEX
Very well, madam. I suppose you can't be
blamed for being suspicious with so many
scoundrels and rouges of the night about.
14th Alex walks away from door, then ducks into the bushes where the
others are hiding. They put on their maskies and follow Alex round
to the rear of the house.
ALEX
Dim, bend down.
(Alex points to an
upstairs window)
15th I'm gonna get in that window and open the
front door.
He climbs up drain-pipe to the bathroom window.
INT. CADLADY'S HOUSE
16th The Catlady enters and dials a number.
CATLADY
17th Hullo, Radlett Police Station. Good
evening. It's Miss Weathers at Woodmere
Health Farm. Look, I'm frightfully sorry
to bother you but something rather odd has
just happened... Well, it's probably
nothing at all, but you never know...
18th Well, a young man rang the bell asking to
use the telephone... He said there had
been some kind of accident. The thing that
caught my attention was what he said – the
words he used, sounded exactly like what
was quoted in the papers this morning in
connection with the writer and his wife
who were assaulted last night... Well,
just a few minutes ago... 19th Well, if you
think that's necessary, but, well, I'm
quite sure he's gone away now. Oh...
alright. Fine. Thank you very much. Thank
you.
She puts phone down, turns and nearly jumps out of her leotard
when she sees Alex in the doorway.
ALEX
Hi, hi, hi there, at last we meet.
CATLADY
20th What the bloody hell d'you think you're
doing?
ALEX
Our brief govereet thru the letter hole
was not, shall we say, satisfactory, yes?
CATLADY
21st Now listen here, you little bastard, just
you turn around and walk out of here the
same way as you came in.
Alex eyes a giant white, fibreglass phallic sculpture on the table
beside him.
ALEX
Naughty, naughty, naughty, you filthy old
soomaka.
CATLADY
No! No! Don't touch it. That's a very
important work of art. 22nd What the bloody
hell do you want?
ALEX
You see, madam, I am part of an
international student's contest to see who
can get the most points for selling
magazines.
CATLADY
Cut the shit, sonny, and get out of here
before you get yourself in some very
serious trouble.
He rocks the giant phallus which has a special weight swinging
inside causing it to swing up and down an eccentric motion.
CATLADY
23rd I told you to leave it alone. Now get out
of here before I throw you out, wretched
slummy bedbug. I'll teach you breaking
into real people's houses. Get out!
24th She grabs up a bust of Beethoven and rushes at Alex. He grabs the
giant phallic sculpture.
Circling, Alex fends off her mad rushes with skilful jabs of the
giant phallus.
She ducks under and clobbers him with the heavy bust of Beethoven.
He goes down, pulling her off balance and they both wind up the
floor.
25th In the struggle, Alex bashes her with the phallus.
26th Distant Police sirens.
He exits.
EXT. CATLDAY'S HOUSE – NIGHT
Alex rushes out. Dim and the others are waiting.
ALEX
27th Come on. Let's go, the police are coming.
DIM
One minoota, droogie.
Dim smashes Alex in the face with a full milk bottle. He goes
down. The others run away, laughing.
ALEX
28th (screaming)
You bastards... bastards.
INT. POLICE HQ – NIGHT
Inspector takes out cigarette and lights up.
INSPECTOR
Right. Right , Tom, 29th we'll have to our
little friend, Alex, here that we know the
law, too, but that knowing the law isn't
everything.
He nods to Fatneck.
FATNECK
30th That's a nasty cut you've got there,
little Alex. Spoils... all your beauty.
Who gave you that then... eh... eh...
He presses Alex's nose, inflicting great pain. Alex sinks to his
knees.
ALEX
Ow... what's that for, you bastard?
FATNECK
1st May: That was for your lady victim. You ghastly
wretched scoundrel.
Alex grabs his balls.
Alex is beaten by the other Cop.
Inspector exits to outside office where Sergeant sits, sipping a
cup of tea.
Deltoid has just entered.
INSPECTOR
Sergeant.
SERGEANT
Sir.
INSPECTOR
2nd May Ah, good evening, Mr. Deltoid.
DELTOID
Evening, Inspector.
SERGEANT
Would you like your tea now, sir?
INSPECTOR
No, thank you, Sergeant. We'll have it
later. May I have some paper towels,
please.
SERGEANT
Yes, sir.
INSPECTOR
We're interrogating the prisoner now.
Perhaps you'd care to come inside.
DELTOID
3rd May Thank you very much
They move into Interrogation Room.
Alex is on the floor in the corner covered with blood.
DELTOID
Evening, Sergeant. Evening, all. Dear,
dear, this boy does look a mess, doesn't
he? Just look at the state of him.
FATNECK
Love's young nightmare like.
INSPECTOR
Violence makes violence. He resisted his
lawful arrestors.
DELTOID
Well, it's happened, Alex boy, yes. Just
as I thought it would, yes. Dear, dear,
dear. Well, this is the end of the line
for me... the end of the line, yes.
ALEX
It wasn't me, brother, sir. Speak up for
me, sir, for I'm not so bad. I was led on
by the treachery of others, sir.
INSPECTOR
Sings the roof off lovely, he does that.
ALEX
And where are my stinking traitorous
droogs. Get them before the get away. It
was all their idea, brothers. They forced
me to do it. I'm innocent.
DELTOID
You are now a murderer, little Alex. A
murderer, yes.
